See that? We all have those in our head. A trap door. We open them all the time. They lead us into a basement where there is no light, only the stench of all the terrible things that have happened to us, stuffed into little glass jars and displayed on dusty shelves. We pull them out, one by one. Unscrew them. Stare. Study. Smell. And we know what’s inside is toxic. That smell never changes. But we can’t let it go. We’ve become collectors. We sit there on a crate made of shame, holding our secrets like prized possessions. Then carefully place them back on the shelf, exactly how we found them. Because we’ll be back soon to open them again.

The past. Why do you go in there so often? Because you don’t like it out here? Because that pain is different? Safe? Familiar?

Because it’s all you have?

Our trap doors are what makes us trapped. Going into our basement keeps us from facing the world and coming into our own. It prevents us from growing and becoming who we desire and are meant to be. It prevents us from living.

So then why do we do it?

Because we live in reactions. Patterns. Knee jerks. What we are used to. It’s familiar. Every time we can’t accept or refuse to face what’s in front of us, we go into our basement. It’s a place to hide. It’s all we know.

Every time you dwell on the past, you are opening your trap door. Every time you dwell on old relationships, could have been, what ifs, have self doubt, stop believing, wonder what went wrong, even if it was yesterday, not because you want to review to learn but because you are deciding to live in dried cement, you are opening your trap door. Every time you are afraid and unsure of your worth, you have gone down into your basement. Every time you doubt the power of the turn around and human resiliency, you are opening your trap door.

You can’t overcome and thrive if you are living underground.

It’s time you put a lock on that fucking door.


See it. Literally. And if you can’t, there’s a visual right above. Snap that image into your brain. Hear the creaking sound of the door opening every time you feel self doubt and fear. Know where it will take you — into darkness. Smell the stench of the past.

Close your eyes.

Take a breath.

Now see what’s in front of you, everything you want. All the possibilities that life has to offer. This time next year, you could be at a new place in your life as a whole new person. You can have the career you want, the body you want, the love you want. But not if you keep going into your basement.

What happened doesn’t define you. It positions you. Read that again.

But only if you stay above ground.

Think about your story and everything you’ve overcome. What you’re going through now is nothing, just another chapter, an important chapter that builds a great story.

You are learning about yourself and the only way we learn is through life turbulence. But only if we lean into it, accept what is, take what’s put in front of us and build something out of it. It’s in this process, we discover life. Not what we’ve built. And not if we stay in the basement — worry, false beliefs, past events, replaying old life turbulence.

Stay above ground and where you are now, no matter how difficult things are or hopeless things seem, is called progression. Not regression. It is impossible to regress if you’re learning and leaning into what is. And you can’t learn if you keep opening that trap door. Because every time you go down there, you are ignoring the gold that is here, right in front of your eyes.

It’s time to write your new chapter.

By making healthier choices.

Because you matter and deserve to be happy.

It’s time to put your head down and get to work. It’s time to take your health seriously and get into the fucking gym. Every. Single. Day. Knowing the better you feel about yourself,the higher your potential / frequency. It’s time to give yourself leeway, love, and forgiveness. It’s time to be brave. Let go of comfort. Lean into doscomfort. It’s time to shed old friends who bring you down. It’s time to get up an hour earlier. It’s time to be still. It’s time to be mindful. It’s time to eat better. It’s time to believe in yourself. Again. Or maybe for the first time.

It’s time to build something.

What the world has for you is up here. There’s no need to go down there anymore. Because what’s in those jars are -

Not you.

You are here.


- Angry

Author of “I Used To Be A Miserable F*CK” and “Single. on Purpose.” IG: theangrytherapist

Author of “I Used To Be A Miserable F*CK” and “Single. on Purpose.” IG: theangrytherapist