My Revelations of 2018
Every year I write down my revelations. I think it’s important to put your life learnings on paper. So you can actually see that you had some. So you know there is movement. So you don’t feel like another year has come and gone and nothing has happened. So you know you are in fact alive. Revelations are everything. It’s half of growth. Without them, there is no other side.
Here are mine for 2018.
- The sky will not fall.
What has given me the greatest anxiety in life is panic. I’ve lived with it for as long as I can remember. I think my dad instilled it in us while we were growing up. He always worried out loud, about bills and debt and all the things a ten-year-old shouldn’t have to absorb and take on.
This carried on into my adulthood like rollover minutes. Panic was my default. My daily go-to. If I didn’t have something big to look forward to, that would change my life, that would bring me closer to my dreams, the sky was falling. So I lived in panic for most of my 20’s and 30's. In survival mode. This pushed me down into a lower frequency. Into a powerless state. I didn’t attract anything. Instead, I swam in my own shit. It’s nearly impossible to practice gratitude when you are always in a panic state. You only see your life as half empty.
2018 is the year I finally realized the sky doesn’t fall. Of course I still worry about things. Mostly money related. But no matter how bad, I know I can find my way. I always have. I’ve finally learned that you can’t thrive if you believe in doom, in permanent dark clouds that don’t part. Yes, there will pain and hardship. That will never change. And of course, there will be some panic. As there should. It’s a sign to swim and find solutions. But the sky doesn’t fall. The sun doesn’t die.
My panic is what used to make me such a miserable fuck. If there’s one thing I will never go back to no matter what, it’s being miserable. Life is way to fucking short. And I’ve swam way too fucking far. Now when I feel panic, I see it as a sign to breathe and step back. To see the whole picture of my story. Knowing that it will arc. That nothing is permanent. That this is one chapter or act break. That there is learning and stretch in this. It’s not about running. It’s about leaning in.
If you think about your story and all the shit you’ve been through, everything you’ve overcome, the heartbreaks, the hardships, what you had to rebuild, re-learn, anything you are going through now. you can and will overcome. You will get through. The sky will not fall. Instead, it will cause you to rise.
2. Everything starts with being a student.
This year more than ever, I’ve learned that creating new definitions create new realities. Most of us pull from old definitions that keep us stuck and chasing our tail. When we do this, our story stops moving forward. History just repeats itself. There is no unfolding. The first thing I redefined was love. I took it out of my little box and allowed it to live. To breathe. I did this by becoming a student to love instead of trying to match old imprints. Ego will push back and you will feel resistance. Our old patterns run deep. But if I keep reminding myself to a student when I feel the old tug, I will be able to create new learnings and more importantly experiences. Because it’s in new experiences that new beliefs are formed. Once we have new beliefs, a new reality is right behind it.
No matter how far you’ve come, what you know and have learned, or built, we must always take the position of a student. If we don’t, we stop learning and having revelations. And without them, there is no growth and expansion. You become limited and live in yesterday.
3. The universe speaks.
I never used to believe things happened for a reason. I saw life as one giant coincidence. But the thing about coincidences is there is no meaning behind them. It’s inherent in the definition. Random occurrences. And if you believe there is no meaning in your events and the people you collide with, life can feel like space. Unknown, endless, and empty. This is how I felt for most of my life. Until I choose to believe that the unfolding had a purpose. That as long as I stand on my truth and what’s honest to me, the events that happen and the people I collide with will reposition me toward my true north. This is how the universe speaks to me. Not with a thundering voice. But by the unfolding of my life. Then it’s my choice to lean in or resist.
If I resist, there is no stretch or learning. And the universe never stops speaking. So there will be more challenges until I finally take the red pill. Then through that journey, although difficult, I will move forward. I will expand. I will become. I will find meaning and a sense of worth. Yes, it will take grit and courage. But without that friction, your story will never shine.
We are not meant to be stones.
We are meant to be diamonds.
I will take my learnings of 2018 and apply them to the new year. With a better understanding of myself and the way I choose to show up in the world. These learnings will act as tools, swords to slay new dragons.
Because that’s what life is about. Our continued journeys. Each year. Each month. Each week. Each day. The neverending climb. The falling down and getting back up. There is no island. Only mountains.
Discount codes galore.