My Fucking Feelings

(birthday edition)

Reflections and revelations from a 44 year old Korean man who is grateful he dosen’t live in Korea.

Not that Korea is bad. I’ve actually never been there. It’s because they count the time you’re in your mother’s stomach so I’d be 45 if I lived there. Fuck that shit. #merica!

Okay, so I try to write a birthday post every year. Trials and tribulations and all the shit I’ve learned about life. Life is a big word so I’ll break it down into categories. A year flies by. But it can also be a very long time, depending on where you’re at and what you’re going through. This year felt really long. I didn’t go through much on the surface, meaning my life wasn’t much different. But I went through a lot mentally and emotionally, which at the end of the day is what truly matters. The rest plays out. So here we go. My lessons of 43.

Work.

Work has never been better. I shouldn’t even title it “work” because it doesn’t feel like work. And I know you hate hearing that because it’s so cliche and people who say that annoy the shit out of you, as do me, because they’re all trying to sell you something. I felt the same way until I actually tasted what they were talking about. It’s possible. Your work doesn’t have to feel like work. I’ve never experienced that until this year. Previously although I’ve enjoyed having a full therapy / coaching practice, it was work. Seven years and thousands of sessions. But this was the year I finally branched out. Focusing more on playing with different types of content, getting on media platforms, and launching my first real book. All this has cemented my belief that you really have to do what you love. It’s the only way it’s sustainable. And it has to be sustainable or you’ll quit. If there’s no passion in what you do, you’ll never reach the island. Most don’t. Because the grind is hard, especially if you dread what you do and what we do is how we spend most of our days. So you must discover what you love, thread it into your life, and trust the process. Those are the three main things I’ve learned. Do what you love. Thread it into your life so it becomes a lifestyle instead of a job. And most importantly, trust the process. I feel like I’ve made huge strides with all three in 43.

“Find what you love and let it kill you.”

• Bukwoski