The new thing I’m playing with these days is listening to me. Yeah, I’m a little late to the party. I’ve always listened to my head but recently learned that those voices are not me. They are products of my story, residue from past experiences, and everything I’m afraid of. Me is the half raised hand in the back of the room. And the reason why his hand is not raised high is not because of uncertainty. Because I never call on him.

Our logic is in our conscious mind. That’s where math lives. But not magic. The magic is in our subconscious mind. That is our spirit mind, the portal to our soul. The subconscious mind is both your guarding light as well as your guiding light. It warns you when you’re about to make a choice that goes against who you are. The hand goes up. We see it but rarely call on it.

Recently, I’ve been calling on him. Turns out he’s got a lot to say. He wanted me to buy a skateboard. I did. And continue to eat shit trying to stop. Reminds me of my entire childhood. He wants me to go to The Joshua Tree and do mushrooms with my friends this weekend. I’ve never done drugs before save pot. I’m leaving today. He wants me to ride my motorcycle more, hug canyons and make friends with the back hills of Los Angeles. No problem. He wants me to come home with sand in between my toes like I did most of high school. He wants me to talk to God like I used to when I was his age. He wants to mute my worries and learn to play again. But most of all, he wants me to be still.

I tell my class that growth is sometimes more about a reunion than anything else. I think life and relationships can create a disconnect with our true selves and we start to get watered down. We feel incomplete and try to fill that with false expectations, things, and other people. Life becomes a chasing and filling game. We spend our days chasing what we believe will make us happy and filling voids because we’re not happy. Every day is about solving a problem instead of living. Life becomes a giant math equation. We live in our conscious (head).

I’m not interested in living in my head anymore. There’s nothing there but dirt.

I’m going to tap into my truth.

Start calling on myself.

Because he knows things.

Learn how to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be. SHFT your perspective. Find your tribe. Change your life.

Author of “I Used To Be A Miserable F*CK” and “Single. on Purpose.” IG: theangrytherapist

Author of “I Used To Be A Miserable F*CK” and “Single. on Purpose.” IG: theangrytherapist