I used to feel the need to be defensive, and didn’t care to understand what triggers that response. Defensiveness is often a natural reaction that stems from various factors such as fear, ego, or a desire to prove ourselves right. For me, it’s been helpful to recognize that defensiveness can create distance and push people away, which is not what I want in my relationships.
Being defensive is a common reaction that many of us experience in various aspects of our lives, including relationships. However, constantly being defensive can create distance and push people away. If you find yourself wanting to stop being defensive, here are a few strategies that can help:
- Awareness: When we are defensive, we tend to prioritize protecting ourselves and proving our point rather than truly listening to the other person. This lack of genuine listening can make the other person feel unheard, invalidated, and unimportant. Over time, this can erode trust and create a sense of distance in the relationship. The first step is to be aware of when you feel defensive. Pay attention to your body’s physical reactions, such as tension or constriction, as well as your emotional responses. Recognizing these signs can help you catch yourself in the moment and pause before reacting defensively.
- Understand the root cause: Take a moment to…
