Carol Dweck (Harvard) did extensive research on what made people successful. She found that the greatest factor between people who are successful and unsuccessful wasn’t IQ or work ethic. It was whether they had a fixed or growth mindset.
In a nutshell, a fixed mindset is stationary thinking. There are ceilings. Limits. What’s possible and not possible. Failure is a thing. It’s real and exists. People with a fixed mindset spin, internalize, and take things very personally. Growth mindset people believe anything’s possible. The world is limitless. They understand the power of and believe in the words “not yet” over never. They judge less, especially themselves. And pull from curiosity over fear when faced with challenges. Objectivity is a skill set. Failure is just information.
- I can learn anything I want to.
- When I’m frustrated, I persevere.
- I want to challenge myself.
- When I fail, I learn.
- Tell me I try hard.
- If you succeed, I’m inspired.
- My effort and attitude determine everything.
- I’m either good at it or I’m not.
- When I’m frustrated, I give up.
- I don’t like to be challenged.
- When I fail, I’m no good.
- Tell me I’m smart.
- If you succeed, I feel threatened.
- My abilities determine everything.
Where you are in your life right now may have more to do with your mindset than anything else.
Which mindset do you have? Not sure?
Here’s an easy way to know.
How do you respond to “No”?
Yes, it’s that simple. I’ve Johnkimed (simplified) it for you.
No, I don’t like you in that way. No, we don’t believe in your idea. No, that’s not going to work. No, you can’t lift that. No, you can’t look that way, feel that way, think that way. No. No. No…
When you are faced with a no, how do you respond?
Do you see no’s as bridges or walls?
“No” used to mean the end for me. “No” meant it’s over. Turn back. I need to change. And since no’s are more common than yeses in this world, my path was constantly blocked. The world was a series of walls. I was Mr. Pac Mac trying to find my way instead of making my own way. The world was a maze instead of an ocean. Having a fixed mindset strips your learning + growth = potential.
If you have a growth mindset, there are valuable gifts hidden in no’s. No’s cause you to stretch, get better, stronger, and wiser.
Today I have more of a growth mindset. I see no’s as bridges. They will be what will eventually get me to the other side. When I get a no, I feel the knee jerk of my fixed mindset tugging at me but then I know it’s there to push me and give me tools to succeed.
Every no is a notch that can drive you forward.
Depending on our mindset.